Reef Donkeys and Meat Fishing

Last night I was so cavalier, dare I say even a bit cocky. I falsely thought I was prepared to leave town tomorrow for seven days. Today is a much different story. I am crazed trying to get some last minute packing done, so I barely have a moment to spare, much less the brainpower [...]

Off The Fence

In my last post I blatantly stole a topic from FlyTalk because the comment thread was wildly entertaining and I just couldn’t resist moving the party over here to keep it going awhile longer. You all did not disappoint! Your comments have been thoughtful and dishy. So it’s time for me to climb down off [...]

Beef or Pork?

One thing I hope you’ve noticed about this blog is that I like to keep the overall tone positive. I try hard not to throw anyone under the bus except myself — which is hard because there are some real idiots out there who are practically begging me to mock them. But I’m not taking [...]

I bowl. Drive around. The occasional acid flashback.

I’d say this pretty much describes my week so far. Just substitute the ‘acid’ flashback for the recurring vision (and associated cold sweats) of seeing 150 second-graders all bowling at precisely the same time. Ah, the end-of-school bowling party. Lest you think all I do is guzzle beer, chase Texas bands and pretend to know [...]

Tunes, Toobs & Trout

Okay, so we only saw two out of three on the river over Memorial Day. It was a straight-up, knock-it-back, hill country honkytonk holiday weekend. The trout were likely hunkered down low, shuddering in fear and mocking us all as we devolved into my favorite variety of the human species, The Hillbillius Redneckus. Joke is [...]

May Is The New December

If you have school-aged children you know what I mean. The centrifugal force that is hurling us all toward the end of the school year brings about enough activities and chaos to rival the holiday season. Spanish skits, zoo field trips, recitals, computer lab open house, last minute playdates, track and field day, ordering the [...]

Will Somebody Bring The Lady A Beer?

Apparently the creepy image of the guy in the Cricketeer suit was the last straw. Really? In between fishing stories I’ve talked about weed cupcakes, shrinking penises, skinny-dipping, beer, beer, more beer, shown videos of half-naked chicks baked out of their minds at a Willie Nelson picnic, cussed, ranted, called a supreme court justice ‘Darlin’, [...]

Almost As Much Freedom As The Birthday Suit

Move over Simms. Look out Cloudveil. Who needs waders when you’ve got the Cricketeer?   Granted the ad doesn’t say anything about its wicking potential, but hey, this suit stretches, twists, bends and is wrinkle-resistant. Seems like perfect river attire for The Gentleman Angler. So if The Cricketeer does anything you can, what will you [...]

Life Is a Game of Inches

On any given day you’re going to have your ass handed to you on the river. Like yesterday. I gave those fish everything I had. I left my soul in that riverbed, to no avail. Finally I retreated to the banks to join the beer drinkers and languish in the early evening heat. But we [...]

When In Doubt, Spoon It Out

Nothing in this big ole bad world of fly fishing tickles me more than a Spoon Casting Clinic. Perhaps you haven’t heard the term (I’m working on the copyright) but I know you know what I’m talking about. It’s when you are casting so badly that your guide can no longer explain, in words, all [...]

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